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Thread: Allowances

  1. #31
    sea witch thalassa's Avatar
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    Re: Allowances

    I don't own my own home and I've been holding down a job since I was 14 with a work permit...
    “You have never answered but you did not need to. If I stand at the ocean I can hear you with your thousand voices. Sometimes you shout, hilarious laughter that taunts all questions. Other nights you are silent as death, a mirror in which the stars show themselves. Then I think you want to tell me something, but you never do. Of course I know I have written letters to no-one. But what if I find a trident tomorrow?" ~~Letters to Poseidon, Cees Nooteboom

    “We still carry this primal relationship to the Earth within our consciousness, even if we have long forgotten it. It is a primal recognition of the wonder, beauty, and divine nature of the Earth. It is a felt reverence for all that exists. Once we bring this foundational quality into our consciousness, we will be able to respond to our present man-made crisis from a place of balance, in which our actions will be grounded in an attitude of respect for all of life. This is the nature of real sustainability.”
    ~~Llewellyn Vaughan-Lee

    "We are the offspring of history, and must establish our own paths in this most diverse and interesting of conceivable universes--one indifferent to our suffering, and therefore offering us maximal freedom to thrive, or to fail, in our own chosen way."
    ~~Stephen Jay Gould, Wonderful Life: The Burgess Shale and the Nature of History

    "Humans are not rational creatures. Now, logic and rationality are very helpful tools, but there’s also a place for embracing our subjectivity and thinking symbolically. Sometimes what our so-called higher thinking can’t or won’t see, our older, more primitive intuition will." John Beckett

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  2. #32
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    Re: Allowances

    I started getting an allowance when my school got us all to start a bank account when I was six or so ... kiddy saver account. I got seven bucks a fortnight, and at least five of that had to go into my account. Later, I started getting 20 bucks a fortnight, but I was expected to buy my own toiletries out of that, so it was more a matter of teaching me how to manage money.

  3. #33
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    Re: Allowances

    Quote Originally Posted by Briton View Post
    If my kids need help getting on the property ladder and I have the means to provide a deposit, you can bet I will lend it to them. Lend ​being the operative word here.
    My parents were a little meaner than you are - I Had to get a mortgage offer from a bank before they'd help me buy a house - and I agreed to what they wonted because at least now my interest part of my payment goes to family and not some faceless corporation - and the interest rate is a little less. Basically My parents hold my mortgage instead of a bank. I currently own about 17-20% of my house. the Mortgage holder owns the rest. I had to get my own deposit together. and while I love my house it's a small cottage in a rural town - Hardly the most expensive house out there.

  4. #34
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    Re: Allowances

    I remember that time my gave me gave me $50 for the week....I knew then I was destined to welfare the rest of my life. If only my mom had been a Libertarian.

  5. #35
    Supporter kalynraye's Avatar
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    Re: Allowances

    Quote Originally Posted by DragonsFriend View Post
    Handing a child money just because they are your child breeds the expectation of handouts. Real life sucks - you have to work for what you get. You have things that you have to spend that money on before you get to buy the things you want. Then you have savings that you need for when things break, and after all the necessities are taken care of you get to spend what remains on the things you want.

    This is why I own my home and property, I have to debt, and I can live comfortably doing the things I enjoy. I didn't get an allowance. I had to work for my money and it means something.
    I think your a 100% wrong. Giving children allowance doesn't breed expectation of handouts. Raising them to believe they deserve everything handed to them on a silver platter breeds expectation of handouts.
    "If you want to know what a man is like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals." -- Sirius Black

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  6. #36
    The Gaze of the Abyss B. de Corbin's Avatar
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    Re: Allowances

    Reading through here I get the feeling that, even with those they love, some people suffer from an over abundance of theory, and an under-abundance of the ties that bind.

    I agree with those who have pointed out that the link between an allowance at home and later performance on the job or in life is tenuous, at best. Yes, it is possible to spoil a kid and raise a real snot, but an allowance, in and of itself, does not do that.

    That takes an attitude, and such an attitude comes from observation, testing, and the lack or quashing of empathy, not a few bucks in the pocket weekly.
    Last edited by B. de Corbin; 08 Dec 2015 at 02:51.
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  7. #37
    sea witch thalassa's Avatar
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    Re: Allowances

    Quote Originally Posted by B. de Corbin View Post
    Reading through here I get the feeling that, even with those they love, some people suffer from an over abundance of theory, and an under-abundance of the ties that bind.

    I agree with those who have pointed out that the link between an allowance at home and later performance on the job or in life is tenuous, at best. Yes, it is possible to spoil a kid and raise a real snot, but an allowance, in and of itself, does not do that.

    That takes an attitude, and such an attitude comes from observation, testing, and the lack or quashing of empathy, not a few bucks in the pocket weekly.
    This.

    I don't own/not own a house, have/not have a college degree, or have/not have a job because I got/didn't get an allowance. I got paid for work done--things like shoveling the neighborhood sidewalks when it snowed and raking leaves in the fall, for trimming my grandpa's hedges in the spring, for babysitting and walking dogs. But I also got an allowance when I was my kids age. My parents bought me the stuff I needed (clothes for school, etc), and a little bit extra (books mostly), but gave me an allowance (whether I did my chores or not, though I mostly did them because they were my part of what had to be done) that I could spend on the little things I wanted (usually books or roller skating) or save for the bigger things I wanted. Sometimes, if I was saving for a bigger thing, they'd match what I saved. I usually used that money to go roller skating or for ice cream when I went downtown to the library on my bike. When I finally got a "real job" (aka a job with a pay check) at 14 (gotta love work permits), my dad sat down with me and an excel spreadsheet and helped me figure out a plan to save my money for the school canoeing trip I went on ever summer.

    I might add that (anecdotal though it is) I had a roommate that was terrible with money. Her parents made her earn every penny of an allowance she ever had, excessively. She had to pay for everything, from field trips to new socks from her allowance. She made and/or thrifted everything she owned because she couldn't afford anything better (which is fine when you are doing it as a teenager because you have a funky personality or as an adult because you are saving money that you can better spend on something else or as a parent because you look really hard to find stuff that doesn't look like it came from a thrift store so your kids get made fun of...but its not fine when you are 12 because your parents are ****s). Heck, she even had to pay her parents back for the co-pay for medication. Now...I'm all for sitting your kids down with you and explaining a paycheck and having them pay bills with you so they understand how much something costs (my grandma would have me check her math on her check book when I was in middle school and my mom started giving me her paycheck stub and the monthly bills in high school to figure out a monthly budget for us), but making an 11 year old pay for their own asthma meds is insane. At 18, this girl left home and joined the military (despite getting several scholarship offers), and blew every paycheck she earned for about 10 years because she could, making up for her miser parents. And, I might add, she's not spoken to them since (obviously, this was just one of the problems they had as parents). Luckily (she just retired from the military) she has a really good job and slowed down on the spending after marrying someone that understands her issues (and also has a really good job, and an accountant).

    I'm not great with money, but I'm not terrible either. Not because I had/didn't have an allowance, or because I have/didn't have parents that taught me the value of money...but because **** is expensive. I don't own a house because I refuse to pay 250K for a postage stamp yard and a cardboard box
    Last edited by thalassa; 08 Dec 2015 at 04:01.
    “You have never answered but you did not need to. If I stand at the ocean I can hear you with your thousand voices. Sometimes you shout, hilarious laughter that taunts all questions. Other nights you are silent as death, a mirror in which the stars show themselves. Then I think you want to tell me something, but you never do. Of course I know I have written letters to no-one. But what if I find a trident tomorrow?" ~~Letters to Poseidon, Cees Nooteboom

    “We still carry this primal relationship to the Earth within our consciousness, even if we have long forgotten it. It is a primal recognition of the wonder, beauty, and divine nature of the Earth. It is a felt reverence for all that exists. Once we bring this foundational quality into our consciousness, we will be able to respond to our present man-made crisis from a place of balance, in which our actions will be grounded in an attitude of respect for all of life. This is the nature of real sustainability.”
    ~~Llewellyn Vaughan-Lee

    "We are the offspring of history, and must establish our own paths in this most diverse and interesting of conceivable universes--one indifferent to our suffering, and therefore offering us maximal freedom to thrive, or to fail, in our own chosen way."
    ~~Stephen Jay Gould, Wonderful Life: The Burgess Shale and the Nature of History

    "Humans are not rational creatures. Now, logic and rationality are very helpful tools, but there’s also a place for embracing our subjectivity and thinking symbolically. Sometimes what our so-called higher thinking can’t or won’t see, our older, more primitive intuition will." John Beckett

    Pagan Devotionals, because the wind and the rain is our Bible

  8. #38
    Live and learn anunitu's Avatar
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    Re: Allowances

    Growing up as a poor kid I did not get an allowance. If we wanted something,we went around collecting soda bottles(Construction sites were very good for that) also as Thal mentioned doing lawn work,or just cleaning for people. Some times washing cars(in the summer that was also FUN)
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  9. #39
    Sr. Member Spiny Norman's Avatar
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    Re: Allowances

    Allowances?! We could only dream of allowances....

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xe1a1wHxTyo
    Once a man, like the sea I raged;
    Once a woman, like the earth I gave;
    And there is in fact more earth than sea.
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