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Thread: Allowances

  1. #21
    Moderator Azvanna's Avatar
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    Re: Allowances

    Quote Originally Posted by B. de Corbin View Post

    The chores were just a part of being in a family, and if they didn't do them, it was a problem for the whole family, because then other people had to do them, and they weren't happy about it.
    Agreed. This is very important for me to teach EJ.

  2. #22
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    Re: Allowances

    Our biological kids didn't have allowances per se. We gave them opportunities to earn money when there was something they wanted that was beyond a certain monetary value. For example, when the Lord of the Rings movies came out, my son wanted a replica sword - so we'd give him money for helping around the house and he saved the $250-300 it cost (can't remember) himself. Fast forward to this year - he's just turned 18 and already owns his own car, pays for his own school books, and part of his tuition.

    Our younger daughter is on the same track - she's a miser when she's got a goal.

    Our adopted daughter came to us with an allowance from the foster care system. $20 a week and $100 a month clothing allowance. She can't save a dime to save her life. Once we adopted her we were no longer obligated to provide it to her - so we use that for school expenses, etc and but some back for eventual college expenses that she's unaware of.

    Our other kids have college funds too, so we try to match them all now. Our son is in community college right now, so he's not touching that yet.

  3. #23
    Nihilistic Goddess Medusa's Avatar
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    Re: Allowances

    *raises hand. Can I be real?
    No allowance. Too poor. Anyone else?
    Satan is my spirit animal

  4. #24
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    Re: Allowances

    My parents only gave me money because both my older sister refused to do any Chores. So I was doing everything that the three of us should have been sharing most of the time. (Cleaning the Kitchen and bathrooms, cooking at least twice a week, mowing the lawn, feeding the pets, hanging out the laundry, putting the dishes in the dishwasher and putting them away when they were finished, washing the dogs, walking the dogs.) But my parents restricted what I could spend it on. I was allowed 2 PC games a year and that was it, but I was matched dollar for dollar on books I bought. I still collect way too many books. I think channeling what they can spend it on is wise. but unless they go above and beyond academically then no exceptions should be made.

  5. #25
    Supporter Hawkfeathers's Avatar
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    Re: Allowances

    Quote Originally Posted by Medusa View Post
    *raises hand. Can I be real?
    No allowance. Too poor. Anyone else?
    Not under my parent's rule, but I had a number of years in early adulthood where I couldn't give myself an allowance - it was just work/home. No movies, new clothes, extra driving, restaurants, etc.

    Can you hear me, Major Tom? I think I love you.

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    Re: Allowances

    Handing a child money just because they are your child breeds the expectation of handouts. Real life sucks - you have to work for what you get. You have things that you have to spend that money on before you get to buy the things you want. Then you have savings that you need for when things break, and after all the necessities are taken care of you get to spend what remains on the things you want.

    This is why I own my home and property, I have to debt, and I can live comfortably doing the things I enjoy. I didn't get an allowance. I had to work for my money and it means something.

  7. #27
    The Gaze of the Abyss B. de Corbin's Avatar
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    Re: Allowances

    My tribe works in concert. We share, and take care of each other.
    Those who have suffered understand suffering and therefore extend their hand.

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  8. #28
    Supporter Hawkfeathers's Avatar
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    Re: Allowances

    Quote Originally Posted by DragonsFriend View Post
    Handing a child money just because they are your child breeds the expectation of handouts. Real life sucks - you have to work for what you get. You have things that you have to spend that money on before you get to buy the things you want. Then you have savings that you need for when things break, and after all the necessities are taken care of you get to spend what remains on the things you want.

    This is why I own my home and property, I have to debt, and I can live comfortably doing the things I enjoy. I didn't get an allowance. I had to work for my money and it means something.
    I don't own my home & have no debt because of the 50 cents a week candy money my parents gave me. I don't think it made any difference as far as that's concerned. I guess every case is different. There are plenty of jobs where people make "iron wages" - and I got myself stuck there for a while, decades ago. The ex made it worse. No more of any of those factors!

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  9. #29
    Supporter Hawkfeathers's Avatar
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    Re: Allowances

    ^^^^ Sorry if that sounded confusing. I mean, I DO own my home etc. now, but it is NOT because of the allowance. I don't think in sentences and it's sometimes hard to write in them. Sorry.

    Can you hear me, Major Tom? I think I love you.

  10. #30
    Copper Member Briton's Avatar
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    Re: Allowances

    I don't see harm in them being given allowance in exchange for some chores when they're too young to get a job. They're simple and mundane (the chores, that is) and teaches them that you can't get something for nothing. As they get older, they will have to do chores whether they like it or not as well as the job which earns them pocket money.

    Personally I see no problem in financially helping your children at every opportunity, as long as they understand it is a favour and they are not entitled to it. I could stop at any moment, for any reason (makes me sound like an addict). As someone who deals primarily with familial ties, I believe the purpose in life is to give your genetic offspring the best chance, but that doesn't necessarily mean throwing money at them. It's a hard world, and they need to understand that there will always be those less fortunate than them and should help them where possible, but I will give my kids the best chance I can because life is hard and I don't owe it to anyone to deprive my kids for their kids' benefit. If my kids need help getting on the property ladder and I have the means to provide a deposit, you can bet I will lend it to them. Lend ​being the operative word here.
    I'm not one to ever pray for mercy
    Or to wish on pennies in the fountain or the shrine
    But that day you know I left my money
    And I thought of you only
    All that copper glowing fine

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