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At what age should kids* be allowed to stay home alone?

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    At what age should kids* be allowed to stay home alone?

    Also (in addition to the title question and poll), what caveats would you give it?

    *This assumes an "average" child of "normal" development and reasonably maturity/responsibility for their age.
    19
    6 or under (please elaborate)
    0%
    0
    7
    0%
    2
    8
    0%
    2
    9
    0%
    2
    10
    0%
    2
    11
    0%
    1
    12
    0%
    5
    13
    0%
    1
    14
    0%
    1
    15 or over (please elaborate)
    0%
    1
    don't know/no opinion/don't care
    0%
    2
    Wonderful Life: The Burgess Shale and the Nature of HistoryPagan Devotionals, because the wind and the rain is our Bible
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    #2
    Re: At what age should kids* be allowed to stay home alone?

    My parents both worked late so I stayed at an after school club for a period, by 9 years I was going home alone & was perfectly fine.
    If you're talking about for a full day, 10 is probably fine.
    If you're talking about night or multiple days probably at a far later age.
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      #3
      Re: At what age should kids* be allowed to stay home alone?

      I'll admit that I'm an advocate of starting small and building up. My kids started "staying home alone" around 5-6 for 10-15 minutes where Hubby or I would literally be outside the apartment building, and they would practice calling up on the phone. At 9 and 7, they are home alone for 20 minutes before they leave for the bus and for about 40 minutes after school, in which they do their homework together, have a snack, clean the litter boxes, and get ready for their after school activities. They also stay at home on school holidays that are not work holidays, but not over summer vacation (probably by next summer they can, or the summer after)...more because I don't want them inside playing video games for two months than because I think they can't be trusted alone (by the summer after next, they will both be old enough to go to the pool without a grown-up, and hopefully have enough manners to manage the library and fishing on the waterfront).

      ETA: I stayed home alone all day, including summer vacation, by 9. I started staying home for an hour or so around 6/7 while my mom grocery shopped. And unlike my kids, I could go to friends houses and to the city pool and to the library, as long as it was with someone and I checked in and out with the neighbor. And did my chores first.

      ETA2: I don't think any child should just BAM! start staying at home alone. It should be a progression that determines their capacity and responsibility. And the parent should be able to decide based on their own children. If you cosset and baby your kids, maybe that age is 14 (in some states, 14 is actually the legal age to allow a child to be home alone)--personally, how on earth anyone thinks a kid should go from *can't be trusted for 5 minutes alone* to *legally an adult, get the heck out* in 4 years is reasonable, is beyond me...but its a thing. But if you raise your kids with expectations and responsibility, they sort of get the hang of it. And, at least in my experience, my kids think its cool to be treated that way (more so the older one).
      Last edited by thalassa; 04 May 2016, 06:03.
      Wonderful Life: The Burgess Shale and the Nature of HistoryPagan Devotionals, because the wind and the rain is our Bible
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        #4
        Re: At what age should kids* be allowed to stay home alone?

        With my kids(Me and my ex) about 11 or 12,BUT not because of deciding,it was a matter of scheduling. After my MIL died,it was hard having them out at ladies place who did about 10 kids. Not child care. When my MIL was still alive,she took care of them(she lived with us) The kids loved her. My own Mother I would never have watch them,she being a bit nuts.
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          #5
          Re: At what age should kids* be allowed to stay home alone?

          I was around 12 when my parents allowed me to stay home alone. My brother played sports and he would have away games that were several towns over. And when I was younger I hated going to those games. By the time I was 12 my parents decided that I was old enough to stay home alone for several hours while they went off to those games
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            #6
            Re: At what age should kids* be allowed to stay home alone?

            I'm mainly with you, Thal. Build up small.

            I've left my 6 and 8 year old in a locked apartment building while I've run to do laundry at the laundry unit (less than a minute drive away). Usually takes me 5-10 minutes. I've also left them inside the house while I've been outside.

            by 9 or 10 they should be able to be at home for an hour or so, and by 11 or 12 they should be good for a bit longer. 13 or 14, a day (8-12 hours).
            ~Rudyard Kipling, The Cat Who Walks By Himself

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              #7
              Re: At what age should kids* be allowed to stay home alone?

              Originally posted by thalassa View Post
              I'll admit that I'm an advocate of starting small and building up. My kids started "staying home alone" around 5-6 for 10-15 minutes where Hubby or I would literally be outside the apartment building, and they would practice calling up on the phone. At 9 and 7, they are home alone for 20 minutes before they leave for the bus and for about 40 minutes after school, in which they do their homework together, have a snack, clean the litter boxes, and get ready for their after school activities. They also stay at home on school holidays that are not work holidays, but not over summer vacation (probably by next summer they can, or the summer after)...more because I don't want them inside playing video games for two months than because I think they can't be trusted alone (by the summer after next, they will both be old enough to go to the pool without a grown-up, and hopefully have enough manners to manage the library and fishing on the waterfront).

              ETA: I stayed home alone all day, including summer vacation, by 9. I started staying home for an hour or so around 6/7 while my mom grocery shopped. And unlike my kids, I could go to friends houses and to the city pool and to the library, as long as it was with someone and I checked in and out with the neighbor. And did my chores first.

              ETA2: I don't think any child should just BAM! start staying at home alone. It should be a progression that determines their capacity and responsibility. And the parent should be able to decide based on their own children. If you cosset and baby your kids, maybe that age is 14 (in some states, 14 is actually the legal age to allow a child to be home alone)--personally, how on earth anyone thinks a kid should go from *can't be trusted for 5 minutes alone* to *legally an adult, get the heck out* in 4 years is reasonable, is beyond me...but its a thing. But if you raise your kids with expectations and responsibility, they sort of get the hang of it. And, at least in my experience, my kids think its cool to be treated that way (more so the older one).
              I didn't leave an answer for this reason. I think it's more of a gradual thing, and I more or less agree with your timeline.

              I was allowed home alone by 10. I was even babysitting by 10 (for short periods of time). By 11 I was allowed to be alone after school and for the day.

              To be honest, not letting kids spend a day by themselves until their teens sounds kind of insane to me. Almost no one waits that long here.

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                #8
                Re: At what age should kids* be allowed to stay home alone?

                I have no idea...

                I can't recall ever leaving them alone until they were old enough to drive away.

                As far as wondering about, where we live, we had to drive them into town in order for them to actually BE anywhere. We're such hillbillies...
                Every moment of a life is a horrible tragedy, a slapstick comedy, dark nihilism, golden illumination, or nothing at all; depending on how we write the story we tell ourselves.

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                  #9
                  Re: At what age should kids* be allowed to stay home alone?

                  I was babysitting at 12 on my own for neighbors. In my state it's illegal for a child to be "latchkey" unless they are 14 or above. It depends in my opinion on the maturity of the individual child

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                    #10
                    Re: At what age should kids* be allowed to stay home alone?

                    I have no average age opinion. One big problem is that we are all basing it on OUR experiences as children in the world. And unless you are under 20, then that literally was a different world when we were children. A lot has changed to make children come off more mature. But all that technology also means there are many more ways for your kid to get perved or hurt now more than ever.

                    I would say it depends upon my neighbors and support system, where I lived, my economic status etc.
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                      #11
                      Re: At what age should kids* be allowed to stay home alone?

                      It all depends on the kids. My younger brother was back-packing for a week at a time before he was 9. At ten most of us were allowed out back-packing with partners. We started doing the family dishes at 8 and cooking family meals at 10 years old. There was no staying at home alone with three sisters and eight brothers. After the first grade we would be away from home as much as we could. During the summers, we could go after the chores were done, as long as we were back by dark.
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                        #12
                        Re: At what age should kids* be allowed to stay home alone?

                        When my brother was twelve, and I eleven we were left home alone everyday between the hours of 8am and 3pm. We were old enough to know how to stay out of trouble, but I think I gained about 30lbs that summer stuffing my face all day.

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                          #13
                          Re: At what age should kids* be allowed to stay home alone?

                          In England the law just says that it's an offence to leave a child alone if it places them at risk of suffering or injury. The National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children recommends minimum ages of 12 for a "long period" during the day and 16 for overnight. Personally, I think people can be a bit too protective these days.

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                            #14
                            Re: At what age should kids* be allowed to stay home alone?

                            I'm sort of necro-ing because I thought this was really interesting stuff: http://www.npr.org/sections/13.7/201...ut-unreal-risk
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                              #15
                              Re: At what age should kids* be allowed to stay home alone?

                              It depends. Do you mean home alone for a few hours after school? For most of the day? Overnight?
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