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Thread: Back after long hiatus (re-introduction and update)

  1. #1

    Back after long hiatus (re-introduction and update)

    Hello, everyone

    This forum helped me along when I started exploring what spiritual paths there are. I grew up mostly agnostic, without practicing any spiritual or religious things besides:

    • being christened as a baby
    • going to church every now and then for some meditation/praying, to light candles and get some holy water, especially when things were going rough
    • different family members either wetting my face or throwing holy water in front of me before a Big Day, like the first school day
    • family members putting little icons of Christian figures in one place or another

    I was always allowed to question things, and my family admitted when they did not know the answer. Not-knowing was and is okay.

    My mother and my godmother practiced something one might categorise as Christian magic, beyond the regular praying that things will happen as one is praying for them to happen.

    I have simply always been curious about cultural and religious things... Particularly when I was a kid, I was very very interested in the buddhist philosophy. (And this interest has never let me go.) So when I was old enough to generally start searching for answers to all sorts of questions I thought I should know before I was eligible to vote, I got a big book about the big world religions and started reading it.

    Then I ventured out and wanted to learn more about (different... forms? of) paganism, which is when I found this forum. I tried all sorts of things that felt right or looked... Fun? Which means I still have lots of incense and a small bag of crystals from that time. I also have the notebook where I started keeping notes, including notes on a (work)book, an introduction to witchery/magic etc. I worked through with my best friend at the time. I forgot its name. Every now and then, these past years, I have written new moon intentions in there. (More I recently made a list with things I would like to learn about nature and different paths/philosophies.)

    Before I started university, I also read this huge book (Eastern body, Western mind) and decided that I was in my head/in the spiritual too much. I also went on a Tim Michin binge in that time. I figured I needed to ground myself. To learn to appreciate the material, and learn more about it, before I continue on my spiritual path. (To put it simple. Of course, there are lots of factors that lead to one choosing to go this way or that, but this post will be long enough as is. )

    Now that I am almost done with my uni career, i.e. until further notice, I felt that is time to balance things out yet again. I have been feeling the urge to get back on my journey for maybe over a year or two, but I haven't been able to get things on track because of busy schedules and, well, you all know what 2020 was like and how things still are.

    I've got to say, I feel less... wandering than I did when I first started out. I feel more comfortable with exploring things that are technically Unanswerable. I also feel less inclined to believe in deities than before, but I have never felt & still don't feel the need to have those type of answers. We shall see. As I have always been, I am perfectly content simply learning about different paths & the things that move so many people. And adding practices in my life that seem meaningful and increase inner peace & a feeling of 'connectedness'. (I also feel content with being led by principles that are more universal & find out step by step what their application and substance is in my life specifically. Being lawful good by nature, and lawful neutral/chaotic good as formed by life, moral relativism only applies to other people when I am entertaining hypotheticals. I know very well who I am and what I stand for, and what decisions I can live with, regardless of whether I will be rewarded or punished for it supernaturally... )

    In any case, it's very pleasant to see familiar usernames, and to visit this forum again.

    Nice to meet you all (again).
    Last edited by kazumi; 29 Jan 2021 at 10:08.

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