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Thread: Coming out of the Broom Closet

  1. #311
    Member Jaxxie's Avatar
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    Re: That Went Worse then Expected

    Quote Originally Posted by anubisa View Post
    I know how you feel. My dad and I had a sorta fight on Saturday. I told them I wouldn't be watching tv church with them and he asked why. I told him that it was because I was not Catholic anymore. He said he had failed as a parent because I wasn't Catholic anymore. Let's just say I got pissed off and walked away to my room and slammed the door shut. He apologized later, but still there is a divide. He doesn't understand that this is me. I'm sorry hon.
    *hugs* I'm sorry for what you experienced as well. My most sincere hope is that my mom is just feeling rattled in her own beliefs, and that's why she lashed out the way she did. Not that I hope she's shaky in her faith, but because I think I could cope with that a lot more than her believing I'm some hellbound sinner.

  2. #312
    Jr. Member Akaichou's Avatar
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    Re: That Went Worse then Expected

    I'm sorry you're going through this; emotions should never be used as a method of manipulation. My mother used to be in a similar state; she wasn't fundamentalist but she was convinced that I was "doing it for attention", that it was "her house and her rules", etc etc and even went so far as to physically try and destroy a shrine ( dedicated to the element and spirits of Water and she was ripping stuff off and trying to put it in the trash) that I had made in my room and that led to a colossal fight.

    My mother is very smart but also very stubborn and emotionally vengeful and its very difficult to get her to admit when she's wrong/ when somebody knows something better than her especially if that person is younger than her. I suspect that she tried to get into Paganism or something similar and had a bad experience with it so now she's extremely wary of it. She always dodges the question or snaps at me.

    I'm also trying to find a place of my own because I just can't deal with her stubborn attitude and grudge-holding and constant use of guilt-tripping. I hope that things get better.

  3. #313
    Member Sith's Avatar
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    Re: That Went Worse then Expected

    My parents and I have devolved into a pseudo don't ask don't tell policy , they subtly try to maintain a christian vibes though, We basically don't talk about religion at all I'm pretty much an Atheist they go to church on Sunday I don't nobody says anything. I also never really felt I could talk to my parents about anything else besides religion we just don't connect I mean we hardly fight, but at the same time we just live in two different worlds. That led me to have to figure out things on my own I didn't have any supporting friends either all my friends are idiots , basically I learned if I wanted to better myself or get somewhere in life it was up to me to make good decisions for myself and this led me on my somewhat selfish path that I identified with the "Sith" from starwars obviously influenced from Taoist and Buddhist that George Lucas incorporated into a more modern philosophy.

  4. #314
    Member Jaxxie's Avatar
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    Re: That Went Worse then Expected

    I just wanted to pop in here with an update. It's funny how things can, and sometimes do, change so fast. I got a chance to talk with my mom today and I won't go into specifics, but it was very healing and positive. She apologized for her reaction, and explained it to me. Come to find out she's been struggling with coming to terms with her own faith as of late. I still have to be careful with my dad, because he's hardline Christian, but at least I have an ally in my mom.

  5. #315
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    Re: That Went Worse then Expected

    Yeah. I don't know what to do with the parental issues either. I was talking n the phone to my Mum a few weeks ago. My brother and his girlfriend are Druids, and I'm a Faery, sometimes I just call myself a pagan. My mum decided to ask what all of this means. I tried to explain to her, and then she just started crying and crying her eyes out on the phone, and then hung up on me.

    I live in Egypt and the UK, she lives back home in New Zealand. I haven't seen her for four years. I can't just pop around and make it better. I don't know what to do?

    I guess she assumes we are all going to hell or something

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    Member Jaxxie's Avatar
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    Re: That Went Worse then Expected

    Quote Originally Posted by Fyre Faery Queen View Post

    I guess she assumes we are all going to hell or something
    Not trying to cast aspersions on anyone's deeply held religious convictions, but that's one of the reasons I found following Christianity to be so stressful. I'm sorry your mom got so upset. Maybe if she sees how your spiritual path brings you peace and helps you to be a better person it will be more positive for her.

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    Re: That Went Worse then Expected

    Quote Originally Posted by Jaxxie View Post
    Not trying to cast aspersions on anyone's deeply held religious convictions, but that's one of the reasons I found following Christianity to be so stressful. I'm sorry your mom got so upset. Maybe if she sees how your spiritual path brings you peace and helps you to be a better person it will be more positive for her.
    Lol my parents probably have the attitude well he'll learn in hell about his mistakes and not try to save me.

  8. #318
    Eldritch Priestess Willow's Avatar
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    Re: That Went Worse then Expected

    Quote Originally Posted by Jaxxie View Post
    I just wanted to pop in here with an update. It's funny how things can, and sometimes do, change so fast. I got a chance to talk with my mom today and I won't go into specifics, but it was very healing and positive. She apologized for her reaction, and explained it to me. Come to find out she's been struggling with coming to terms with her own faith as of late. I still have to be careful with my dad, because he's hardline Christian, but at least I have an ally in my mom.
    Glad to hear this result! It's always good to hear a good ending (ok not really an ending, but a good start) to a story once in awhile.

  9. #319
    Copper Member LunarHarvest's Avatar
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    That being said...

    Re: That Went Worse then Expected

    It is good to hear that the situation with your mother has come to what can only be called a good ending. I hope that after this little speed-bump things continue to get better from now on. :3

    Quote Originally Posted by Jaxxie View Post
    Not trying to cast aspersions on anyone's deeply held religious convictions, but that's one of the reasons I found following Christianity to be so stressful. I'm sorry your mom got so upset. Maybe if she sees how your spiritual path brings you peace and helps you to be a better person it will be more positive for her.
    Since my family are all devout Catholics, and at least some of them believe in Limbo, I will have - when I come out as Shinto to them - the ability to simply say that there is nothing in Shinto doctrine which will prevent me from dying in their god's good graces. I hope that will be a good enough argument to redirect most of the hate. That being said, they will undoubtedly still find this as a distressing realisation about myself.

  10. #320
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    Re: That Went Worse then Expected

    Hi Jaxxie,

    Thank you for your kind words. I'm glad to hear everything is going a bit better for you. That's great.

    I know what you mean, but I think my Mum is too closed minded to look for beautiful things like peace and happiness. She is a very success an money orientated person, who follows law and government in a very black and white way, and the same with Christianity. She believes in that fire and brimstone kind of stuff. I've really given up years ago, and I live on the other side of the world, which kind of helps.

    But it's lovely to read all of these supportive posts from other people here. That's fabulous.
    Love, Starlight and Magical Wishes from Felicity Fairy
    www.felicityfairyparties.co.uk

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