Hi Im new too this forum I dont remember if I made an intro yet Ive been bussy
Anyway Ive been an on and off pagan since I was maybe 15 ish and being raised in a not so open minded house I had to hide my faith for over eight years. (Despite the fact that I practiced wicca in secret since then)
However Ive had some interesting events happen recently that I would like to share.
Recently Ive had a batttle in my heart about who I am and what I believe. I prayed to God to lead me to the truth nothing more nothing less and over this summer I poured over christian theology and all sorts of books. I started to look at myself as more gnostic but some thing inside of me could never let go of paganism as if I was lying to myself that I was not a pagan. And eventually after much open minded study of the other side of the fence (including reading C S Lewis's appologetics) I came to the conclusion that yes I am a pagan.
I basically said God I love you and I tried to understand what you want but sorry Im not IN love with you.
The strange thing was that as I fasted and prayed and put my heart and soul into reading book after book It just STRENGTHENED my pagan faith.
I guess now Im really not a christian at all and I never was and never will be.
But I suposse questioning your faith in something helps you understand why you believe it in the first place
Anyway Ive been an on and off pagan since I was maybe 15 ish and being raised in a not so open minded house I had to hide my faith for over eight years. (Despite the fact that I practiced wicca in secret since then)
However Ive had some interesting events happen recently that I would like to share.
Recently Ive had a batttle in my heart about who I am and what I believe. I prayed to God to lead me to the truth nothing more nothing less and over this summer I poured over christian theology and all sorts of books. I started to look at myself as more gnostic but some thing inside of me could never let go of paganism as if I was lying to myself that I was not a pagan. And eventually after much open minded study of the other side of the fence (including reading C S Lewis's appologetics) I came to the conclusion that yes I am a pagan.
I basically said God I love you and I tried to understand what you want but sorry Im not IN love with you.
The strange thing was that as I fasted and prayed and put my heart and soul into reading book after book It just STRENGTHENED my pagan faith.
I guess now Im really not a christian at all and I never was and never will be.
But I suposse questioning your faith in something helps you understand why you believe it in the first place
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