What do you advise?

[Ophidia]

Re: What do you advise?

If you are planning on marrying someone, get to know their family very, very well before saying "I do". You don't just marry your beloved, you marry everyone they are related to, both past and present. Crazy doesn't just run in families - it's contagious.

When my husband talked about his mom & dad, and their various & sundry issues, I thought he was exaggerating. If anything, he was understating just how deeply dysfunctional his family really is. At least with my family, all our crazy is on the outside for the world to see.

[thalassa]

Re: What do you advise?

I made this comment on a blog, in response to a woman that thought the Fox News guy should get in trouble for hate speech or something:

Hate speech (although this doesn’t qualify as hate speech anyhow) isn’t illegal in the US, unless it is inciting crime, in which case, its considered a hate crime. As per the SCOTUS in Brandenburg v Ohio, “The constitutional guarantees of free speech and free press do not permit a state to forbid or proscribe advocacy of the use of force, or of law violation except where such advocacy is directed to inciting imminent lawless action and is likely to incite or produce such action”.
Being a bigot, a jerk, or an idiot isn’t illegal (and can’t be, if we really believe in freedom of expression), neither is being ill-informed or talking out of one’s rear end, Even as a pundit. There might be plenty wrong with his comments and his actions, but there is nothing against the law about it. And…I’m okay with that. I *want* these people to be openly bigoted, rather than in the closet about it–I’d rather know who too be on the look out for, I want to point the finger at their idiocy and their hypocrisy so that others know who to be on the lookout for. Hatred shouldn’t be locked in a closet out of fear from the law, it should be held up to the sunlight and exposed to reason and compassion, to show it for the darkness and diseased thinking that it is.

My advice: Before you go off the deep end, about something someone else says, remember that true freedom of expression means that you have the freedom to be offended, not the freedom from offense.

[Hawkfeathers]

Re: What do you advise?

Always follow your inner voice.

[iflewoverthecuckoosnest]

Re: What do you advise?

Always follow your inner voice.

Simple yet wise. I needed to hear that. Thanks.

[Morrigan]

Re: What do you advise?

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

[Maria de Luna]

Re: What do you advise?

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

The version I use goes, "fool me 9 times shame on you, 10 or more times, shame on me" I could just be using a futurama quote here, but I think I may be too persistant...

[Morrigan]

Re: What do you advise?

The version I use goes, "fool me 9 times shame on you, 10 or more times, shame on me" I could just be using a futurama quote here, but I think I may be too persistant...

It is just a matter of opportunities : I give none *evil smile*

[Hawkfeathers]

Re: What do you advise?

Simple yet wise. I needed to hear that. Thanks.

YW. The hard part is tuning in to the right frequency.

[nbdy]

Re: What do you advise?

Overall I would say that the greatest satisfactions in life have been due to the small things. I used to spend a lot of time fretting over the big things, but those tend to take care of themselves if the small things are in order. It is the small things that create my existence, the rhythm and tone of my life -- watching the sun rise, wiping the kitchen counter, cooking for some one I love, walking the dog. That sounds almost too sappy to post, but I will anyway.

[volcaniclastic]

Re: What do you advise?

No matter how much it hurts, you can always recover. The only reason you can't is if you think you can't.

(take it or leave it, but it's true)

[ChainLightning]

Re: What do you advise?

Life's short. Eat dessert first.

[DeadJellyfish]

Re: What do you advise?

If you are planning on marrying someone, get to know their family very, very well before saying "I do". You don't just marry your beloved, you marry everyone they are related to, both past and present. Crazy doesn't just run in families - it's contagious.

When my husband talked about his mom & dad, and their various & sundry issues, I thought he was exaggerating. If anything, he was understating just how deeply dysfunctional his family really is. At least with my family, all our crazy is on the outside for the world to see.

Very wise indeed! I almost married a man with a crazy mother. Actually, that entire side was just as crazy. I thought it didn't matter, as long as I loved him. But the more time I spent with him and his family, the more it really started to weigh me down. His mother would always say horrible things to me. Like I was using him for his money, that I didn't really love him, or that I would leave him eventually. And any little thing I did wrong was severely criticized. She was delusional, then I realized my ex also possessed some of her delusional qualities. When I left him I felt more alive than I had in years.

I mean, every family is crazy and dysfunctional, just in their own way. It takes some figuring out to see which kind of crazy you can handle the best.

[B. de Corbin]

Re: What do you advise?

75 out of 100 is too many times to catch Jell-O shots in your mouth.

[Jasmine]

Re: What do you advise?

Loving someone doesn't mean letting them get away with murder. Always stand up for yourself, no matter who it's against.

[thalassa]

Re: What do you advise?

Be thankful for what you have, because no matter how bad it seems now, someone, somewhere has it worse.

Never get in a fight that isn't worth losing.