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Thread: Questions regarding mental illness

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    Questions regarding mental illness

    Hello! I am still rather new to paganism and I had some questions I was hoping someone with more wisdom and knowledge than myself could answer I am rapid cycling type 1 bipolar disorder with borderline personality disorder and will be on medication for the rest of my life. I have been on medication since I was 19 years old and living without medication is unfortunately not an option for me. I do experience, what I believe to be, forms of psychic awareness when I am off of my medication but I also suffer from paranoid delusions so sometimes this is hard to distinguish. Any psychiatrist would tell you that what I experienced as psychic awareness or energy during my mania is merely delusions of grandeur, and that very well may be true. But I don't feel anything of this nature, EVER, no matter how deep into meditation I am able to transition while on medication. Maybe my mania simply made it easier to become connected and it's still possible for me, just harder? My medications, while improving my quality of life, do create a "fog" over my brain. Sometimes I stumble for words and feel as though I am detatched. Changing my medications is also unfortunately not an option for me, it has taken many many medications to find this combination I seem to also really be struggling with building energy, I feel so drained from the moment I begin.
    So I was curious if anyone else has some experience with mental illness and performing rituals and psychic awareness. Any tips, ways to move past this, suggestions, or just to know I'm not alone would be great!

  2. #2
    Live and learn anunitu's Avatar
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    Re: Questions regarding mental illness

    Ok,a little history,I was diagnosed as type 2 Bi-polar many years back. Type 2 is much less an issue as it is a much milder form of the condition. I spent some time within the mental health system mainly for a major depressive episode,and I was never really effected that much by the manic part. What I did find being around people with much more severe conditions was one can with the right medication lead a pretty much normal life. It does seem that Bipolar people can be very creative and many well known actors and artists among others do deal with this condition. I feel at times I would not be as creative a person if I was as they put it "Normal" I do understand how problematic type 1 can be even with medication,you can have "breakthrough" mania episodes,but some people seem to feel your diet may effect your chances of having less chance of a "Breakthrough" and may help you to cope in your quest to stay even. My Brother was type 1 and had delusional and very aggressive mania sometimes. All i can really tell you is try and maintain your life in a controlled and productive way. It has been said that genius is next to madness,and from personal experience I think that is very true. Good luck with your condition,and may you not have to many negative aspects. For myself the depression was the more difficult part of the dual sides of type 2.

    Also there was a time I would not even consider talking about being bipolar because of feeling that it would make people consider you weak,though mostly that was an internal reflection rather than from other people.
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    Re: Questions regarding mental illness

    Thank you for your reply. Yes I do watch my diet, and like your brother my mania typically manifests in agressive delusional behavior. My life is very well controlled on medication, and in general I am a very happy and stable person now I never struggled with the depression side very much, I am very grateful for that. I know how hard the depression can get and I was always fortunate that my cycles never lasted more than a few days at most. Best wishes to you as well!

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    Sr. Member Jera's Avatar
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    Re: Questions regarding mental illness

    My medications, while improving my quality of life, do create a "fog" over my brain. Sometimes I stumble for words and feel as though I am detatched.
    I had the same issue when I was on anti-depressants. I suffer from clinical depression and GAD (generalised anxiety disorder). After trying several different SSRIs with little, no and even adverse effects, I skipped off them completely and now manage my condition with oxazepam and lamotrigine. Still get many "down" days but it's better than the numbness I feel when I'm on antidepressants. The withdrawal symptoms whenever I had to go off a medication or change it were also horrific. I understand there are those who have to be on medication constantly for their conditions (my mom has biplolar II and she is on meds permanently, though she is now stable and living a full life because of it), and the meds definitely do cause a numbing of the spiritual or psychic feelings and experiences. Unfortunately I have no advice to offer regarding ritual except to to try and not create a mental block by thinking "I cannot experience the spiritual or ethereal because of my medication/condition". The moment you do this, you close all receptivity of your own accord. Just keep at it and know that the mind is a powerful thing that has the potential to overcome great obstacles.

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    Sr. Member WinterTraditions's Avatar
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    Re: Questions regarding mental illness

    I may not have anything like bipolar, but I do have multiple different disorders; Anxiety disorder, chronic insomnia, and Asperger's syndrome. And then add that on top of my general poor health, and I have to take a total of 70 doses of medication every week, and that is not including the pain relief pills I pop.

    It did cause a lot of problems when it came to my psychic awareness, but I found a solution. I'm not sure if it'll work on others, but it certainly did with me. Confirming that it was okay with my doctors, I now use aromatherapy and herbal infusions to counter the effects of the medication. I sleep with amethyst, a natural psychic stone, and cleanse it every week.



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