My partner has had depression for at least 2 years. It gets better or worse depending on his life stress, but it's a constant presence at some level. He gets frustrated and gives up easily on medical options, so I'm afraid it's going to be a long, long time before it really improves. My struggle for the past 6 mo or so has been to get him to work with a psychiatrist to adjust his medication so it's actually helping him at all, and to help him do this without him freaking out from too much pressure. It's majorly affecting our sex life, and I'm more careful when he's prickly because he argues more easily. He's still himself--last night we had a refreshing conversation about his latest silly world domination plan and skunks--but he's a lot less joyful and playful than when we were dating, and I miss that.
Because all this is nonstop, I'm finding myself getting frustrated about things I can tell him about but not really discuss without hurting him: wanting more sex, wanting him to get treatment, wanting him to stay remotely on top of his chores and bills, etc. I've got good outside support from friends, but that only helps so much. I keep thinking about how he helped me through PTSD when we were dating, and now it's my turn, and that we both swore that whole "in sickness and in health" bit. It helps, but again, only so much.
Are you living with a spouse/partner with depression? How do you deal with its effects on you and on your relationship?
Because all this is nonstop, I'm finding myself getting frustrated about things I can tell him about but not really discuss without hurting him: wanting more sex, wanting him to get treatment, wanting him to stay remotely on top of his chores and bills, etc. I've got good outside support from friends, but that only helps so much. I keep thinking about how he helped me through PTSD when we were dating, and now it's my turn, and that we both swore that whole "in sickness and in health" bit. It helps, but again, only so much.
Are you living with a spouse/partner with depression? How do you deal with its effects on you and on your relationship?
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