I am finally dating someone for the first time in a year. In a lot of ways, things seemed great at first, but I am seeing some very unhealthy patterns. To be frank, I am afraid of my new boyfriend. Physically.
He has not hit me, yet, but there are many red flags that things could go down that road. I find myself crying all of the time because of the subtle insults he tucks here and there.
I know this roadshow all too well, and I want out before things get any worse. But, I am scared to break up with him because I know how bad his temper can be. I am very small and he is very strong- a point he often reiterated while "joking" about how easily he could "break" me. How can I do this and be as safe as possible? I want to get this done asap. I don't want to lead him on, and I don't want to drag this out any longer than it has to be. Should I honestly tell him that he scares me and that's why I'm leaving? Do you think that would only make him more likely to react violently? Should I bring a trusted person with me to make sure he doesn't hurt me? Even do it over the phone?
I am very confused and emotional right now. Part of me feels very caring and affectionate toward him, but I know deep in my heart that it is not okay to feel afraid of your partner on any level, and that much of his behavior is harmful to me and will only escalate. I need to do it, I am just not sure how to do it safely.
Any advice and/or support would be wonderful right now.
He has not hit me, yet, but there are many red flags that things could go down that road. I find myself crying all of the time because of the subtle insults he tucks here and there.
I know this roadshow all too well, and I want out before things get any worse. But, I am scared to break up with him because I know how bad his temper can be. I am very small and he is very strong- a point he often reiterated while "joking" about how easily he could "break" me. How can I do this and be as safe as possible? I want to get this done asap. I don't want to lead him on, and I don't want to drag this out any longer than it has to be. Should I honestly tell him that he scares me and that's why I'm leaving? Do you think that would only make him more likely to react violently? Should I bring a trusted person with me to make sure he doesn't hurt me? Even do it over the phone?
I am very confused and emotional right now. Part of me feels very caring and affectionate toward him, but I know deep in my heart that it is not okay to feel afraid of your partner on any level, and that much of his behavior is harmful to me and will only escalate. I need to do it, I am just not sure how to do it safely.
Any advice and/or support would be wonderful right now.
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